Monday, June 18, 2007

Summer in the Sea

Years ago a very clever sailor with a background in radio created a hilarious rundown of what to expect if you summer-over in the sea. I have long since lost that tape, but will try to remember some of it. If anyone else out there has the script, please let me know.

June 1: Mass exodus as cruisers put their boats on the hard, in slips, on moorings. Those with air conditioning secure a slip. Those without make the brave decision to summer-over. But where?

For years we've heard the summer-overs talk about heading for the relative "cool" of the northern Sea, around Bahia de los Angeles. Cooler than what? Hell?

July 1: All sex stops in the Sea of Cortez

August 1: Urine turns from brown to black, no seeum bites abound. By now everyone has lost at least ten pounds and relationships are strained to the breaking point. (See July 1)

September 1: Hurricanes threaten the Sea. Up until now they have stayed south, gone to Hawaii to screw up someone's honeymoon, or some such. Now they are setting their sights on a scraggly bunch of skinny, grouchy sailors gathered in northern Sea.

October 1: Only two more weeks of heat to go, but now the serious hurricane season is in full bloom, sending boaters scurrying hither, thither and yon for cover.

October 15: Glorious cool returns, as do the cruisers who abandoned ship and fled for cooler climes in June. The summer-overs regale their lessers with tales of a glorious summer in Sea. But where, the returnees ask, is your wife/girlfriend/mate/crew?

Novemer 1: Singlehanders abound in the Sea.

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